How To Manage Her Commitment Expectations

Dear Speed Seduction® Student,

One of the tricky things when you get good with Speed Seduction® is the thorny problem of having women fall for you and fall for you hard, when all you want is a little bit of fun.

As guys, we have to be aware that even the most bitter, cynical, hardened woman can have her heart burst wide open and her feelings of wanting to be loved really come to the surface when she is properly seduced.

Let’s face it: sex can make all of us feel very vulnerable, and most especially so with many, if not most women.

To illustrate my point, let me share a note from a student facing this situation:

Dear Ross and Bros:

Went out with a young lady I met on the internet on Saturday.

Any way, one Twin Brothers pattern led to another and we ended up back at her place.  No need to go into the details, but when I left we both had big grins on our faces.

The reason I feel a little guilty is that I haven’t called her since.  I’m pretty sure that it won’t do her too much harm, but also pretty sure that it won’t make her feel too good and won’t do her self esteem too much good either.

Although I’m not that interested in developing a relationship with her, I would prefer to be able to  walk away knowing that, at the very least no damage has been done, however small that might be.

Now, I was pretty honest with her and didn’t promise her anything other than an interesting evening.  I did say that I would call her, and  later in the week I shall.  But what would be interesting from you guys would be any thoughts on how to set her up on the date so that they see the evening as a fun, exciting event and are happy not to expect too much after it.

RJ: The key here is to be honest about your intentions if she asks.  The second thing is, if you are not looking for an incredible connection, but just a roll in the hay, don’t use “connection” patterns.

I teach there are 4 doorways into any woman’s mind and emotions:

1. Getting her visualizing vividly.
2. Getting her to feel strong emotional connections
3. Getting her to feel strong, pleasurable body sensations
4. Getting to her core value structures

If you sense a woman wants too much from you, commitment–wise or is looking for than what you want, do not use doorways 2 and 4. They create a very strong emotional bond with most women.

You can use them, lightly, but mostly I’d lean on doorways 1 and 2. There are plenty of patterns to pretty much guarantee you can get in without creating deep emotional bonds.

Of course, if a girl is desperate and needy enough, she will CREATE those bonds, even though you never used any patterns at all! That’s when we can get into some trouble even though we proceeded with care. The problem isn’t with us, but with our “subject”; she’s just too friggin’ needy to deal with it.

If you sense you have a girl who is on the needy edge like this, it might be better to just let her slide and NOT have sex with her.

How’s that for having a life of real choice: you actually have so much variety and choice with women that you can feel great being able to say NO to a girl instead of it being the other way around! Imagine that!

Peace and piece,
RJ

P.S. Emotional connection patterns are VERY powerful. They do to women what high heels, push up bras, and boob jobs do to use men; they make the subject loose control!  Use them with caution.

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