Are You “Confident” With Women?

Dear Seeker of Success,

Many times the guys who come to me, only do so after years of being deeply stuck when it comes to meeting, attracting and enjoying women.

Throughout those years, they have often spent countless hours trying to “figure out” how they are going to get out of their romantic desert and into the land of moist, pink abundance!

Funny thing: the “solution” to their problem could be something SO different than the way they are thinking, it would never even occur to them!

You see, it is usually

a) the action
b) way of thinking
c) BOTH

that is so far outside what you are used to doing, that this new direction will bring you the results that are way beyond what you are used to GETTING and ENJOYING!

That’s why, when students tell me they can’t possibly imagine doing/talking this way, or imagine women enjoying it and getting turned on by it, my answer is always:

“Fantastic! That Is Exactly Why You SHOULD
Be Doing It! Because What You’ve BEEN
Doing Clearly HASN’T Been Working.”

As an illustration, here is an email I received from a student.

He had been stuck being very nervous approaching women and just could NOT get himself to walk up and meet women.

He was fine if women were introduced to him, but he could NOT talk to a stranger and was struggling with his “confidence”.

This student was confused… not his fault though.

See, there are multiple types of confidence.

To Just Look For “Confidence”
Gets In The Way Of Greater Success,
Until We Disambiguate

First, I explained to him that he was confusing “performance confidence” with “acceptance confidence”.

To clarify:

Performance confidence is when you have already done something well many times in the past, so you know, based on experience and skill, you will likely do well again.

Acceptance confidence is simply a matter of giving yourself permission to try something new, even and especially when you don”t know what will happen! It’s admitting you don”t know, being ok with that, and giving things a fun and fair try anyway.

Doesn’t that make good sense?

Then meet me back here tomorrow when I show you the absolutely, totally whacked-out drill I gave him to do.

When you see it, you’ll call me a Goddamned lunatic,

But this guy wasn’t complaining when he saw the results.

Til then.

Peace,

RJ

P.S. Speed Seduction® YOUR key to power, success and choice with women, without bullying , buying, begging, BS, booze, or biceps.

Your (possibly) last chance to ever see me teach it live happens in San Diego – seats are filling fast.