Dear Speed Seduction® Students and Fans,
Recently, I was in San Francisco, doing a consult and hanging out with some lovely ladies, and it got me thinking about the breakthroughs necessary to have massive success with women.
Click below to watch on my blog, then leave your comments:
Peace and piece,
RJ
P.S. Since I know you’re ready to achieve your own breakthroughs and claim the success with women that you deserve, check out my Speed Seduction® 3.0 Course by clicking here.
P.P.S. To learn LIVE from me about how to get all the women you ever want, join me for next 3-day seminar. The next one starts this Friday (4/23) in Los Angeles, and we are also coming to New York and London. Click here to check out the complete seminar schedule.
I like! However, I do think the only new part or realization you had is the word, “orientation”. Everything seems quite familiar of what you taught in the past.
But with this new word I can take it in lighting-last and know exactly what you mean.. without having to explain being frustrated over what one did wrong and not accounting for also what one did right.
P.S. Again, my apology for writing that crazy comment last week. I hope it didn’t negatively affect your connection with that smokin’-hot 21 year/old girl in Brazil. But I saw her comment saying something like that if these types of creeps come to your seminar then she would have to pass. That’s BS. You kick out guys for disrupting or bothering the ladies. I think she just can’t afford a room and plane ticket and use that as an excuse for not wanting to meeting you and thus ameloriate her frustration for not being able to be CP’ed by a true master!.. Alright, as Stan Lee would say, “‘Nuff said!”
Great point. But why is it human nature that we focus on the failure and not the success. Overcoming this would be helpful in all areas of life.
Carl,
I don’t ask questions about “human nature” because there is no experiment in the world that would verify or falsify the theoretical answer.
These “essential” questions can’t be answered with clarity. My answers are “operational” in the sense that they can be tested and confirmed
or denied by experiments in the world.
RJ
http://www.rjcoaching.com
When it comes to orientation, I like realism. Instead of focusing on one thing or another, or even labeling things as bad or good, I like to see what’s there, period. Seeing thw whole picture allows you to see the interconnection and the dynamics of the situation, without placing value or unneccesary emotion on it. Just a neutral noticing what’s there and what’s going on. I find this very useful for learning.
Hans,
Oh yes. I by NO means advise people to ignore mistakes. You’ll see in the next video what I have to say about that.
RJ
http://www.rjcoaching.com
Hi Ross,
Great vid. once again 😉
I really hope that I can get to one of your seminars, but yeah there is that money detail – require for this valuble learning experience – So I will most def. see you once I get that together.
Oh yeah hope you come to denmark someday…
And if you ever want a protege – man should you pick me!
Peace n love – Elliot
Elliot,
I AM coming to Denmark this summer. Just not sure when. But I am coming there to teach this summer! Stay tuned!
Brilliant, makes a great deal of sense. Cheers
Ross, this is definitely great advice. The guy made a mistake with tossing out the number, but there are millions of women out there, that’s what he needs to remember. Even though he made a mistake with tossing out the digits, you can’t let how you feel in the moment control what your vision is. There was no guarantee this girl would even see him again just because he had her phone #. He should go out the next weekend and sarge some more(just like i’m doing tonight) and be proud of his progress in getting a # and making out with this lovely lady. Thanks for all your advice over the years.
-Derek, Milwaukee WI
longtime student and fan
Derek, to put a fine point on it: successful people may acknowledge how they are feeling, but their VISION is not dependent on how they feel in the moment.
RJ
http://www.rjcoaching.com
Thanks Ross. Very timely advice for me. I’d been dwelling on the bad stuff a bit and your words helped me zoom out and get a better perspective.
And you got it free, Dan!
Aren’t I a “peach” of a guy?
RJ
http://www.rjcoaching.com
Hmm, yeah – it’s interesting when we want something to work so bad and all our focus is on why it just wont seem to work for us when everyone else seems to be getting it in no time. It makes us forget the basics – your subconscious only brings you what you show it.
So when you’re focus is on “things not working”, guess what you’re gonna get; things not working. As a matter of fact, since the “why” also is there, and because the subconscious is by nature very eager to help you (props to Major M), it’ll probably give you a whole list of things not working.
Seeing all the things you did wrong, making your game go down the drain, sound familiar?
See, the subconscious mind does not have any logic-capabilities, it also has difficulities communicating with your conscious mind (the part of you that you’re consciously in control of). What you do and what you imagine, is just about all the communication it gets and it’s not able to distinguish the two (no logic remember).
The subconscious mind is the warehouse, it’s where your raw mental power is and it’s vastly more powerful than your conscious mind – think a pea compared to Australia. Now, it makes sense to use this power in the same way it makes sense to pour gas on the car if you want it to run, right? So you wanna let your subconscious know that you wanna go towards success (again, no logic, it really doesn’t know), and the way to do this is to act like you are and imagine you are.
It’s pretty much the only way to communicate with the subconscious, which is what makes it so critical.
To keep your focus on where you wanna go (eyes on the prize you know), to ask “what worked?” and to switch the “why?”s with “how?”s, is to start using less resources on taxing stuff. I mean, we wanna pay more taxes, do we? 😉
Laters,
G
Hi Ross
Any new stories or are you going to keep “rehashing” the same old boring ones!
Be good for you to get some new material.
Looking forward to it.
Peace
JD
Jack,
Repetition is the mother of skill. But I appreciate the subtle hints.
RJ
http://www.rjcoaching.com
You really need some in field video so what you are saying is believable.
Lib,
Your wish is my command. But how would you KNOW they weren’t actresses I hired? I’m serious…
The best test is the one that can NOT be faked, and that is your own experience.
It’s easy enough to apply my ideas for yourself. So go do it and let me worry about doing a product of me in-field. One day, I will.
Don’t wait to try ideas that are easily executed and are offered free. That would be just stupid.
RJ
http://www.rjcoaching.com
Ross, that was excellent. Just like DD would say its all practice. You sound very intelligent, learned and know what you are doing. But though for us not so educated guys its kinda of hard to understand what you are saying but you are right on in what you are saying, thanks, mc
MC,
I hope my gift is that I can take important ideas and help anyone understand and apply them.
RJ
http://www.rjcoaching.com
Great video, Ross. As a trainer myself, i find that rather than focusing on what people are doing “wrong” or could improve, its best to start with what is “right” for them. Its amazing how just getting clear on that will naturally help them adjust some of those points they arent happy about. Thanks for that validation and reminder.
Mike,
That’s why I get paid the big bucks….
RJ
Nice post Ross.
I think your student got too attached to the girl, and attachment is the cause of all suffering. So instead if he had decided to move on, he would have 6 weeks of success with new women, instead of 6 weeks of failure. I agree with your point that, we need to focus on what we are doing right, now, but simultaneously, we need to focus on the now 🙂
Aj,
That’s why I meditate. It allows me to focus on my “now” on both the subtle and the obvious levels, the macro and the micro. It’s a magickal tool.
Check out my teacher, Shinzen Young at:
http://www.shinzen.org
Hi RJ,
I cannot resist watching videos when they have informative value beyond the marketing. I liked this video and agree with what you way totally, and waiting for the next one in this series.
Cheers,
Three more coming. Tell your friends.
RJ
http://www.rjcoaching.com
You are so right.
I have been into “game” for over a year now. And have done better then I have in that time with women, then I have in my whole life. I have worked hard and done a lot of sets.
But I still get frustration, confusion, and at some times can not go up and talk to a woman.
So I need to look at what I am doing right first.
Very good Ross. A woman is a mystical creature. A bit like a cat really.
Geoff,
Taz and TJ says, “Don’t insult us. We are far more mystical than any hu-man female”.
RJ
http://www.rjcoaching.com
I love your work Ross, I own several of your courses, including 3.0. Your work has changed my life and I look forward to see what you come up with next! I.E. More Magick & psychic influence. I also would love to get some more of your book recommendations, I have bought a couple of the books you recommended and loved them. Like the serge king huna book, and western sex magic book!
Thanks, Robert.
I should do a Magick/PI course the end of the year huh? Maybe in some exotic location. I’ve been meeting some interesting new people with some odd “talents” I might want to share. More on that later
RJ
http://www.rjcoaching.com
As an AFC, I think changing my orientation is the best piece of advice I’ve ever gotten. I never thought to focus on what I was doing right. Now the hard part, like always, is to apply it.
Hello Ross, i can confirm that i am having the same sort of problem, its like am doing the right approach am good at opening and helping the women feel the attraction and am good at gettin numbers but when i go to call or text them, i get blanked, can you help me with this problem what should i say when im making the move to try for a second meeting with a women. by the way i have a theory, it just popped into my head, when approaching i wanna make a woman feel intrigue and curiosity so i took the direct approach and kinda changed it, i walk up and say “excuse me, i can see your busy, dancing etc, its just i find you so… incredibly…” then walk away, hoping that i’ll have left enough of an impression that she’ll come and want to know what i was going to say? please tell me what you think thanks man, your a life saver, i got outta shitty relationship and your work has completely changed my crappy non confident ways. Eamon
Hi Eamon,
It’s hard to say, without talking to you more, what your challenge might actually be. My guesses:
1. Not enough tests. Have to do more approaches to get a clear picture.
2. Aiming at numbers is the wrong thing to aim at. Or less useful. Aim at getting them intrigued and hooked into the conversation.
Just my sense. We should probably talk next time I do one of my free “talk to RJ” things. Stay tuned here for when I will do the next one. I try to do one a month as part of my community “outreach” either in the form of a Ustream broadcast, or a free “call my cell phone” day-I’ll probably do the next one as a group coaching call.
RJ
http://www.rjcoaching.com
My thought on this is that you’re trying to lure me into some advanced training, probably charge me an arm and a leg for. What’s the catch Ross? Why would I need your guidance to use NLP on women?
Ryan,
Lure? I think I’m educating people that my guidance and coaching is a smart choice. What do you think of the idea I expressed? Does it match your experience or is it a mismatch?
Great Ideas my man, you are the best and you bring Life! But tell me please if you can… why are your eyes so black? Thx a lot Ross
That’s how I show up in this kind of informal lighting, and also it’s a genetic discoloration of the skin. And too much sitting in front of a computer screen I think!
I agree… when you focus at what you do right you can begin to understand how these attitudes can sometimes be natural to you, i mean, how sometimes you already did things right, but because you were so confused or frustrated you couldn´t see it… But for that to happen i think it´s even more important to reframe yourself to not look at people as tasks to be completed but as an opportunity to learn how to get what you want, which i think is one of the most brilliant breakthroughs that SS works with…
Being a believer in the laws of the universe I do find being in a good/positive state of mind is key for doing anything with confidence and pleasure. I also know how hard it can be getting into a positive state of mind when the chips are down and nothing seems to be going right (esp. with chicks). I would love to hear more from you on this RJ… any recommendation you have for getting back into the right state of mind for attracting girls back into my life. Thanks for the video!
As always Ross, You hit the right spot with simplicity
that includes and surpasses all the complexity in it.
Thanks for your contribution!
I
From a psychological point of view. I’d say the guy wanted to toss out that number, because he knew that with as easy as it was to get that girl to make out with him that quickly. He knows that she isn’t going to be worth it for the long haul. He just doesn’t take the time to focus on aspects like these.
Fantastic video again. Ross you are the man!
R.J as a long time student of yours i still wonder in why is it that people still belive that for some ting or someone that they want in their life must be hard work or it will not last long or of no value.From the first time i read the part in you delux home study course my life change,i mean why should they get what they want and i still have to hold my thing in my hand and hope that i get lucky those theys days are long gone I’am 54 this year and my main girl of three years will be 24 in june life is a learning experence and i’am having FUN
Right on! I’m 51, my last girlfriend was 21! Go!
Yeh man I totally agree, this happens to me often (Sat night), so now I go out with the attitude of what ever – there was once at Easter when I felt like super man, I got a long with some 20 somethings (hi 5ing) diden’t score but had a great night. Any chance you comming out to Oz, or perhaps I can meet you half way Europe -Sept ? ps love your last comment 41.