Dear Speed Seduction® Student,
You know the saying, “All’s fair in love and war?”
I have news for you: it’s not. Especially when she changes the rules on you in the middle of the game.
I’ve had many students report how they will be involved with a woman and then abruptly her behavior or response patterns will change.
Or, as one student called it, she’ll move the goalposts. For example, once you’ve slept with her a couple times, she’ll want to start spending more time non-sexually. Then, once that happens, she’ll start insisting you stop seeing other woman and go exclusive with her.
Hey, if she’s the one you really, truly, want to be with, and what you have brewing isn’t a “real-hate-shun-ship by default,” this being her way of drawing you closer might mean you’re getting your results.
Smart men like you draw the women you desire to be with closer to you by using Speed Seduction®. So if she uses her own methods to accomplish the same goals for herself, isn’t turnabout fair play?
But what if you’re not ready for this? Seems like an ultimatum: “Either be my boyfriend, or you don’t get to pet my kitty anymore.” (Especially sucks if she ALSO happens to have a really nice domestic cat who you enjoy hanging out with over at her place.)
Let’s back this up and look at it from another perspective.
Maybe what you offer her is SO much better than what she has experienced before and better than what she perceives she could get elsewhere, that NOW she doesn’t want to bother going anywhere else. In her mind, the feelings she has with you just are the best and she is afraid if you go away, she can’t find them elsewhere.
I would reframe this so she gets that yes… together you and she experience things wonderful AND she has also grown as a woman to the point where her ability to experience and have wonderful feelings might just extend to many MANY things and situations that have nothing to do with you. That it ISN’T just about you, but about how her own responsiveness and ability to feel inside have grown.
Way back in the day I knew a young lady who at first resisted me, because up until me, she had ONLY ever been attracted to guys who treated her like crap. I did NOT pursue this girl, but occasionally she would call me or I her and we’d hang a bit or talk on the phone. Each time, I extended her comfort zone just a bit more and had her affirm, ratify and REACH for more good feelings.
What shifted is, she no longer saw what she felt with me as being alien or something she had to get used to. NOW, she was defining it as what is NORMAL for her, and the old stuff is no LONGER normal. It’s now what she reaches for and what she wants, AND she is finding she can redefine who she is and what she wants IN OTHER AREAS OF LIFE AS WELL, so it isn’t just about me.
Now ask yourself: would that beat a poke in the eye?
Peace and piece,
RJ
P.S. Remember the phrase: “Show me better, show me more, show me more, show me better…NOW.”
P.P.S. Understanding the real psychology of what gets women ready to go will give you an advantage over almost every other guy out there – even guys who are better looking or make more money. This is just a sliver of the trim-trimphing mastery you’ll find inside Speed Seduction® 3.0.
One of those odd times when the great Ross seems to have diferent persepective on this to me. Pulling you in, wanting YOU as an exclusive is is only affirming you have LOCKED her down, driven the tent pegs in on her. It’s a sign of your success, your desirability to her. To the womans mind she aint movin the goalposts, thats only as it may appear to the man. So if your patterns, your metaphors, your Milton statements have taken on her a little too strong, all you do is lossen some the locks a little. To me a womans mind is like a an old fashioned holiday trunk, with a dozen locks on it. You can get rid of an obsessed woman in three days flat simply by black oil souping, or reversing the attraction patterns to revulsion patterns.
Well seeing as these things get moderated, Ross can publish stuff of mine when and how he likes, no problem with me. I got to thinking, maybe this woman gto Pavlo dogged too much on personality, relationship, and romance, rather than great sex with you. Too many of the locks have gone on romance. Well you can hardly avoid putting romance locks on a woman, thats a big part of the secret. You need two or three to hook her at all. But you can do romance and somehow try to steer and twist that towards a strong association in her mind with great sex with you.
Like Pavlos dog associated a bell ringing sound, with food.
RJ,
Great and unusual material, and I hope my story takes this further in similar directions:
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There are no hard and fast rules to any of this. Except everything is INTENT and STATE. You have to know what you want, and how to use self-suggestion or meditation to reach intense states to make it happen. If we pay attention, new and unusually opportunities can sometimes open up, but you have to be aware of possibilities in order to reach out for them.
I met a lady in the local library a couple of weeks ago. She’s very intelligent and imaginative, deeply interested in high quality stories and poetry. I started a conversation with her with no intention of sarging her, and found out we had several strong areas in common. I went out to my car and brought in a sample of eight of my photographs I’ve taken in 8×10 size. I do wedding photography on the side, but didn’t tell her this. The photos had three wedding pics and five others, including a couple of kids portraits, and a pet portrait. Her face lit up. She loved them.
She asked me about the photography, but I put them away saying that I was more interested in her. We talked for a while and I was starting to calibrate her for where her curiousity and enthusasium were directed. On a simple level I found she liked high-quality chick movies (no surprise there) such as Jane Austen, but she was also attracted to coming-of-age movies such as “Stand By Me.” I pulled two DVDs off the shelf, one called “Easy Virtue,” a very high-quality chick movie full of cool word-play and dramatic irony, and another called, “A Painted House,” a good coming-of-age movie written by John Grisham, and handed them to her saying, “You will really like these.”
I saw her again the following week. Her eagerness was intense. She said the DVDs were perfect for her. Although, she was busy that day, she took time out to talk for close to an hour. We exchanged some personal stories, and she quoted me some poetry she had written. My stories were from my life as a kid from ages 7-11 when I had some adventures similar to those coming-of-age movies. I didn’t have time to script in any sarging stuff, but I did add some passionate descriptions and more emotional content than I would have told to a guy. Call it semi-sarging. She talked too fast and was attempting to impress me with her intelligence, as women like this are sometimes prone to do. I was already impressed with her sharpness, she didn’t need to show more. I’m now looking for other possible qualities.
Neither week did I go in intending to sarge her, and the second week this was my mistake. I thought about it later, asking myself why I’m attracted. Highly intelligent, imaginative women are special to me, and this is half of a formula for an interesting partner. What I’d like to try to do for the next step is to have her slow down and relax with me, both in her speech and response. This involves an obvious trust and comfort level that I need her to reach to interact with me the way I’d like. Trust, comfort, and deep relaxation, along with a highly developed imagination, can easily be motivated into sensual states, especially if you go there first. There is the possibility of setting a fire in this girl that she doesn’t have a clue can even exist. This is not manipulation guys, if I can do it, she’ll love me for it, a win-win situation.
I’m thinking of simply running one of your old ‘incredible connection’ patterns on her the next time I see her to help establish the right vibe. Besides, I will actually mean the connections feeling, as I will project it as part of my reality. It’s not so much what you say, as the state you project while saying it. I have an intuition this lady is ready to blossom. If I’m wrong, it will be a fun attempt anyway.