Dear Speed Seduction® Student,
It would be safe to say that I get some of the most interesting “fan mail” you could imagine.
Most of it is from people praising the brilliance of my work and offering thanks for what it has done for them. And I’m grateful for that.
Occasionally there is the request for free stuff, which I almost always turn down. (But make up a good story I’ve never heard before and who knows-you might get some free courses. But be warned-I’ve heard them all)
The ones I find most interesting are the hostile ones and the cries for help.
The hostile ones are usually filled with spelling-errors, grammatical mistakes, and vile suggestions about my ancestry, ethnicity, and personal anatomy.
The cries for help are sometimes overwhelming and always humbling. It would be no exaggeration to say that many guys are at the end of their proverbial rope when it comes to this issue of success with women.
So what do I say to that guy who has been crushed by his wife of 20 years having an affair and walking out on him, taking the kids with her too? What do I say to that guy who just turned 30 and has never had a girlfriend in his life?
The first thing I tell them is that everything they’ve been through up to this moment of writing me is true, real and valid. I don’t try to talk down or minimize their pain, fear and frustration. Nor do I give them trite, enraging advice like, “Look on the bright side” or “You’ll find someone”.
The next thing I tell them is this: everything you’ve experienced up until now was based on the tools, information, technology and ways of thinking you’ve had up until now. Change any of those things, and you’ll get much different results.
Anyone who had the tools, technology, information and ways of thinking you’ve had up until now would have gotten the same results you’ve gotten and could not have done any better.
Then I tell them this: what’s possible for a person with the right tools, technology, information and ways of thinking would seem like magic to someone who doesn’t have them. Just think of a primitive tribesman in some rainforest in Brazil who has never seen an airplane. If you told them you could get across their entire country in 2 hours, they’d laugh at you.
Usually that begins to create just enough doubt in their prior conviction that they are hopeless that I can get some leverage into their mind and explain what really works with women, as opposed to what they’ve been stuck thinking and doing. And then I recommend my Triple Threat Offer (which you can read about in this link).
But you know, this weekend, at my niece’s wedding, I heard a metaphor that really struck me. I’m going to share it with those “cries for help” guys from now on, and I’d like to share it with you. It’s about the power of the human spirit to be remade, reshaped, and renewed no matter how seemingly broken.
You see, at a Jewish wedding, one of the final bits of ceremony is that the groom steps on a glass and breaks it. There are many interpretations of what this symbolic act means.
But the Rabbi at my niece’s wedding explained it like this. “The human spirit-a person’s life-is like a glass. No matter how seemingly broken, smashed to pieces or shattered apart, glass can always be gathered up, re-melted, and shaped into something beautiful again.”
Now that metaphor really struck me. And you know, in the work I’ve done, I’ve seen it to be true.
I’ve seen guys who thought their divorce was the worst nightmare, only to see later how they’d been set free to use these wonderful tools to enjoy happiness, success and satisfaction with women of a quality they’d never imagined they could have.
I’ve seen guys go from suicidal despair to dancing with joy at how happy the women in their lives are making them.
I guess I now have a new metaphor for my own job: glass smelter and glass maker. But don’t you dare call me a glass “blower” or we are going to have problems.
Peace and piece,
RJ
P.S. Check out my Triple Threat Offer and my Nail Your Inner Game Program. Two great offers to begin re-shaping the glass of your love life:
Thank you, Ross.
This is an awesome post for those who can recognize how useful it is…
The concept of having the right tools, information, vibe, belief, etc., is incredibly valuable, but also incredibly obscure to most people. Anything out of their experience is often obscure for most people.
But when you first pace their reality, they begin to trust your authority and understanding… then you can start to offer them a new direction (if it’s a lady you want to seduce), or you can explain to them a whole new frame and set of tools (if it’s someone you are teaching).
Did you notice where Ross utilized pacing and leading?
And anybody who doesn’t have the products mentioned in this post is seriously missing out. NYIG is my favorite RJ product of all time (this has completely changed my approach to life… not just sarging), and the three products in the triple threat package are all absolutely excellent as well…
keep smiling,
ben