[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NYsS_09zdIc[/youtube]
Dear Speed Seduction(R) Students,
I hope you are enjoying this ongoing “Spy On My Coaching Program” video series.
Notice in this video I talk about how:
1. In the beginning, as you get more skilled, you may experience more frustration.
2. How sometimes the way you frame the situation may be hiding the actual problem and the actual opportunity.
3. How I review my four beliefs for handling any response a woman gives in the field.
Please watch and PLEASE comment below.
Peace and piece,
RJ
P.S. You can always check out the coaching program here.
Ross,
Thanks for this. This has been a major sticking point of mine. I generally do GREAT when I isolate, but when I have some dufus meddle in on my conversation I get stuck. I think this is in part due to two reasons: 1) I'm a polite guy 2) I'm an aggressive guy with a temper. So, when someone interrupts, I take internal offense at it and I lock up because I get angry, but I don't want to act inpolitely to the guy and it just throws off my game. Usually two things happen, either I lock up and my game gets ruined or I eventually start to shame the guy saying things like, “What? Were you born in a barn or something? We were sitting here having a nice conversation and you just jump into it! I don't remember inviting you into this conversation. What's your problem?”
The second of the two ALWAYS works. Shaming someone like that ALWAYS works. I just don't like to go there because it changes the mood from fun and romantic to confrontational, even though it does express a display of strength that can be helpful.
Anyhow, I love your reframing of things as “Is this something I can utilize?” I think if I enter into that kind of flexible mindset it will help me a lot. Thanks.
Oh my god this one is priceless! It had been easy to isolate girls say in the grocery store and such. But if you are at a friend's party and there are hot women around. Chances are that a lot of flies are hovering around her, and that kind of noise usually kept me from seducing effectively.
As Mithra said, I don't like to be confrontational unless I really need to. Prefer to flow like water than shatter like a rock. So this material is perfect to stay away from that boring bully personality.
The progress paradox…. That was awesome. That's what I'm also going through currently
Yes. Remember what I’ve taught in the past and still do teach today: there’s power in paradox.
RJ
That was very useful as i could relate to that situation and have been there myself . I have your course but have not studied lately but am starting to feel comfortable with the idea that I could succeed at this and have. I really had a good and bad experience that almost wiped me out abouy a year ago. I got what i wanted but really made some critical mistakes insinuated to much ,promises and cost me too much money with a 45 year old . The 25 year old more sofisticated fun and charming girl went well but no cigar . The 43 year old worked well in a short time but i wanted more ,she moved . So in short your method works and you do need to evaluate your progress and consider where you have come from and your successes. Some guys are gifted for gab im am not but you have explained some techniques to help with this and I do remember them it can frustrating but fruitful.
The progress paradox reminds me a lot of what scientists say about particles as they approach the speed of light. The amount of energy that it takes to accelerate an object faster as it approaches the speed of light actually increases exponentially.
Ross, I think the state you describe here as “sarging the room”, and within it – the casualness and willingness to walk away (that you demonstrate with these sample responses), is a very important mindset and attitude that some SSers might miss. It would be valuable to elaborate on this one more, I believe.