Dear Speed Seduction® Student,
Recently on this blog, I touched on the idea that some guys seem to be able to get any woman, any time, without even trying. Using the example of the gentleman who seemed to be able to seduce a woman by just touching her hip, I pointed out that there’s more to the story.
Without knowing this, however, it makes sense that some guys wonder: is it possible to be succesful with women like the so called “naturals” – meaning without using embedded commands, anchors, etc. etc.?
By natural, I mean: a man who is not always consciously aware of what he is doing to attract and seduce women.
Here’s a thought / teaching point for you:
“Naturals” don’t fight themselves or second guess what they want to do or have done. ZERO internal struggle.
Every “natural” I’ve known or modeled never, ever worries about the results once they’ve taken action.
They don’t wonder, “What if this doesn’t work?”
Or “Maybe I should have said something else.”
Or “I probably shoudn’t have walked away”.
They also don’t fight themselves in the moment. That means that when they want to talk to a woman there isn’t another part of their mind pulling in the other direction saying “Wait! Don’t! She probably has a boyfriend.” Or “Wait til you think of the right thing to say!”
A natural may not even be “confident” in the traditional sense of knowing he’s going to get the girl. But he IS confident in the sense of having zero internal struggle. When he moves, he moves with both feet instead of one foot staying stuck.
This is important whether or not you are consciously doing patterns, commands, and anchors.
Peace and piece,
RJ
P.S. When you register for a Live 3-Day Seminar, in addition to all of the in-person changework we’ll be doing to blast you through these barriers, you will get immediate access to an online “prep course” that covers this as well.
i completely understand WHY this is true…when i was an AFC before SS, i had so many complaints in my head of her having a bf, or shes too hot for me, or im too short, and when i tried i had so much internal struggle..
after doing alot of inner game work with Ross’s NYIG, i have been able to talk to a girl ANY TIME without hesistation or that rumination or resistance, it took about two weeks of medidation and affirmation and i just walked the world with “confidence” and by confidence i mean, no internal struggles…using the patterns and embedded commands are awesome but sometimes, for me at least, i needed something else to get rid of those voices and the big “well what ifs”
~dibz~
@Domenick
Here is a suggestion: when you do find yourself ruminating or wondering about women, make sure you discipline that.
Meaning: it’s ok to have a wild bronco among the tame horses. He can add some spirit and life to the pack.
But you have to make sure the bronco is in the right corral.
So…make sure you only do this “ruminating” in a relaxed state, in a special place in your home or some other spot where you can lay down or sit quietly, go into a super relaxed state, and do the ruminating from there and there only.
Some suggestions on how to pull this off:
Wear a rubber band around your wrist. When you find the ruminating happening, snap the band and say to yourself, “Hey….make an appointment if you want to see me!” Then visualize for a moment going to your special place to do the ruminating and make sure to keep the appointment with yourself.
Sometimes the ruminating is pointing you to some lessons you need to learn or corrections you should make.
Remember one of my rules: Ask yourself, “What state to I want to be in when I consider this challenge?”
RJ
So then the goal for us is to have absolutely no care the result. But if we have no care why even do it? I suspect naturals must care about something. I don’t see naturals as well adjusted individuals, am I right? What are they thinking? My one natural buddy actually got a “service dog” jacket for his English bull dog just so he could have all the chicks fauning over him at the mall. Brilliant, but he could get 5 chicks a day anyway. And he’s married.
I’ve seen a lot of these other “gurus” advertise that you can “have any women, any time, regardless of whatever”, and when I actually sit down and talk with them, they admit it’s hype.
Because it is. I’ve met guys who were living in their car wondering why they can’t get laid, and instead of finding ways to be a real man and take care of themselves, they spent their pennies to go to some seminar with some guy who promised something that they were never going to get.
To be honest, I don’t think you need patterns to get women, they are merely GUIDES to get you comfortable with being able to talk with women about something, while having a strong sexual vibe. In fact, I think that the patterns are more about getting YOU comfortable with putting out a strong sexual vibe, and being playful and fun, while being comfortable, but that’s just my take on it.
One of the things I’ve learned being in countries where I don’t understand the language is that the VIBE is probably more important than the content.
That’s right. Now a lot of people don’t realize that Ross has greatly improved on what he has done in the 20+ years that he has been doing this, and that he has much more to offer than just you might realize.
The best deal I’ve ever seen is his coaching program which you can get for a ridiculously low price of $1 for the first month.
Before you waste your money on some other product that some other guru is offering that supposedly will have porn stars jumping you on the street (which I think it is a total load of cr-p), you should look at what Ross is really offering now, not just his free stuff, but spend the $1, see if he can deliver on getting you the kind of life where you have the kind of women you want in your life (personally I am quite happy with the kind of women I can consistently get, and still have that are more than 20 years younger than me writing me, and it’s not because I am rich).
Now, all that said, I am not LOOKING for more women right now, but I KNOW that I can get the kind of women that I want in my life when I want them.
Women want to have fun, and feel good, finding ways to let them know that YOU are okay with them being wild and crazy and that YOU are not judging them is as important as any magic words or secret phrase that you have in your head.
Get out, meet women, and if you have any questions or challenges, spend a $1 and ask Ross. If you are too cheap for that, don’t whine that you can’t get women, because frankly what do you expect?
Hi Ross,
You are spot on!
feeling that inner struggle and duality inside is the exact problem that I have when I want to approach women. one part of me wants to do it and the other part does not believe I can pull it out.
No matter how many new techniques I learn, I cannot get over this at the fist place.
I own your SS 3 program, but which product do you recommend that deals with that problem specifically?
Thank you
@Ali
Nail Your Inner Game or my new Sexual Aggression Mastery/Showing Up Attractive Courses.
Hi Ross,
I consider myself a natural. I’m around your age and have been checking out your material online for a few years , and yes, it’s good sound theory that works well… IF YOU’RE NOT AWARE OF WHAT YOU ARE DOING !!!
The closest analogy I can offer would be…say you have been wearing a perfectly good rolex watch that tells perfect time for years and thought nothing of it, until you decide one day to open the back to see how it works, and your thinking “how the f#!? does this thing work “(getting into your head)
Once again Ross, the stuff you’re teaching is good ,very good in fact, being a natural though I believe, is the learning and implementing of these ideas unconsciously , meaning that when you have been say, hanging out with naturals for years or your dad or brother was a natural, you pick up these ideas without knowing and use them instinctively.
All the best
Mike
Then how or what states does a natural induce? Is it his lack of inhibition, he radiates sexuality..what are his “patterns”
Fantastic observation on the reality of Naturals! I have a friend who is a natural and i am very aware of how sure and confident he is of his ability and that there is little, if no, internal struggle as well as no secod guessing or stressing whether he might have tried a different strategy or whatever. This has helped me identify my sticking points and diminish/transform them.
I like, “confident in the sense of having zero internal struggle”.
Thank you Ross,
I wasn’t sure about “showing up attractive course”, but I checked it out and it seems very structured and organized course with exercise.
That’s great
@Ali
Told you so! My favorite words besides “It’s so big!”
What states does a “natural induce” ? …well, the state he is in at the time.
Inhibition can be sexy ( very sexy, actually ) it kind of spells a…”well if he doesn’t care, why should I ?” sort of vibe. (it gives her an excuse)
As for patterns, phrases ect,…. I was using them way before I became aware of what I was actually doing. Before the “community” internet ect.
Reading Ross’s stuff gave me that “AH HA !! so thats why I was doing so well ” kind of revelation. Ross’s teachings brought the patterning thing to my consciousness.
Having said that, Ross’s teachings can also let the “NATURAL” be aware of where he is going wrong, not just in patterning, approach ect. but the inner game issues as well. That was a biggy for me.
You’re right. I have/had a friend that is a natural but he’s annoying as fuck. He doesn’t think about anything before he does it, like walking in my apartment with dirty shoes on, crashing until 2 pm the next day, using offensive language about minorities and gays, farting in my car, spilling food all over, walking into a female friend of mine’s room while she’s sleeping and trying to sleep with her (who he just met that day) despite her saying “no” etc. I couldn’t handle the guy and the most annoying part is he was ALWAYS picking up women and getting laid. I couldn’t figure it out – like what does this guy have over me?? He’s not that good looking, he’s not in shape, he doesn’t drive a nice car, he’s starting to bald and his jokes are corny as fuck! He did read The Game but there’s no way he could have gotten that good just from reading The Game and he doesn’t wear nail polish, lip rings or wigs. Anyways, it all comes back to not fighting yourself and for all this guy’s fuckery and annoyance he simply doesn’t fight himself. Doesn’t mean I actually have to stay friends with him though 😉
I recently heard a phrase “The Illusive Obvious”
Me years ago – Observing a natural and Taking what works must have been overlooked countless of times and each time I was Without Speedseduction(R)
[Before I found the teachings of the GodFather of the Seduction Community (Hi) My friends and I would look at a natural and have thought “Howz E Doin It?”]
Now I’d say the worm has turned.
Now – To me, it’s obviously about taking what works and conciously taking control of your mind with both feet on the ground with a firm hand practice the fundamentals until you polish it for your success/Achievment for the person you are everyday more and more becoming..
Oooohhh d-.-b)) Do I hear the pitter patter of female high heels?
Russell x
P.S. If your in LA, look before you leap…
P.P.S. Do that 1 dollar a month coaching programme
P.P.P.S. I point at the moon – You look at my finger – Bruce Lee said that – Creator of Jeet-Kun-Do – A mixed martial art that takes what works, and only what works for you and practice it until it happens to be naturally available right when you need it. Obvious.
A natural is just that, like Ross said somebody who is successful with women, but isn’t conscious of what he is doing to attract them. In that case we are all naturals to some degree, it is a choice for women to be attracted to men, their choice.
Its your conscious choice to want to be with women, and i’m pretty sure then its their conscious choice also, so really you don’t have to be a rocket scientist of poon to get laid. They themselves have already been dreaming about doing all kinds of things with a guy, and heck you could be that guy!
Just be comfortable and be yourself, and guess what if you would quit repeating to yourself over and over you cant get a girl or they would go for me because, then you just might stand up straight and get yourself a girlfriend and wonder how you did it later.
It can be a mistake if your learning form the wrong sources which are all around, people giving their odd advice which sounds good, tv especially. yes I do want to unlearn the stupid crap I mistakenly put in my head while trying to learn about women.
Your life is exactly the way you want it, your brain only sees things the way you want. If your in love with some girl who doesn’t give you the time of day, your brain is assuming that’s what you want, and making sure that’s what you get. If you tell yourself I can find a new girl that enjoys me a lot and I enjoy her a lot, your brain is going to make that true. Pay attention to what your thinkin all day, do you love women that aren’t loving you back? In that case thats what your brain is being told that you enjoy. Focus your concentration on what you want, if you want new girls then think about them, have you ever noticed while you were thinking of your ex after you broke up she didnt call you, and when you decided to get with other girls, she all of a sudden wants you again, its your brain if your saying to yourself, my ex girlfriend broke up with me im sad, then your brain is going to assume that you love girls that break up with you and your going to feel horrible.
If you move on and say I can get new girls who knows when, who knows how, who knows where, thats the fun part its a complete surprise, this person can be anything I imagine there is so many different people in this world, im so lucky, then your brain will get you new girls, it will even get you your old girlfriend with a new attitude.
Hey Joe Henry,
Your comment was interesting, and a rather common scenario ,…. with YOUNGER “naturals” this sort of behaviour is considered almost normal and in some circles “cool”( women put up with it/or think its fun) ……but as you get older,…40’s 50s… unless your name is Charles Bukowski or Kieth Richards this kind of shit will not wash.
Mike