Dear Seeker of Success,
Many years ago, when I was first making my TV talk show rounds, someone asked me, “What do women want?”
I said something that nearly caused a riot in the studio audience. “Only an idiot would care what a woman WANTS.”
I paused dramatically to deliver the rest of it over the shouting that erupted, “A smart guy only cares about what a woman RESPONDS TO!”
You know, I wasn’t kidding about that. I meant it then and I mean it to this day.
Remember:
There is what women SAY they want.
There is what women THINK they want.
Then there is what women ACTUALLY RESPOND TO!
Only that last one counts.
Now, in that regard, one of the more frequent questions I get is, “Does Speed Seduction® require me to be “nice” to women? Your patterns sound a lot like old-fashioned romantic “sweet talk” and I don’t want to be pegged as a sweet, “nice” romantic guy.”
Let me say this right now:
I Have NEVER Said You Should
Be “Nice” To Women
In fact, most “nice” guys are boring as bat-shit, self-pitying whiners who are too out of touch with reality to see that what they are doing just doesn’t work.
And rather than change, they blame the women.
So let me draw an important distinction here:
- There is “nice” which women do NOT favorably respond to.
- And then there is “pleasant” which the sane, self-respecting women LOVE.
(I won’t get into the women who want to be hurt, abused or punished. I do not personally use nor will I teach how to use the language of abuse. You can go to my competitors to learn that.)
A “nice” man only knows how to be agreeable. He doesn’t know how to challenge women and he can’t or won’t set the lead. And he filters everything he says through the belief that women are fragile little flowers who need to handled with OH so much care lest they be broken. YUUCH.
One more thing: women don’t trust his communication because he just won’t dare say anything that might offend them.
Now, A Pleasant Man Is Something
Quite Different
Pleasant is power, held in proper restraint and exercised with precision and elegance. A pleasant man will speak his mind, set the lead, but he also knows how to listen and show the proper degree of interest and respect.
He may put himself first, but he also genuinely cares for and cares about his woman(or women). They are of great importance to him as long as they treat him right and work within the rules that he has made very clear.
Most important: his world is his own.
He never, NEVER makes the WOMAN his world, around which he orbits. He does allow her to come into his world and occasionally even be at the center WITH him.
When you get these distinctions you will move into a powerful life with women.
You will never be “nice” again.
But you will also never have to bully, beg, buy, BS, or use booze or biceps.
THAT should give you something to smile about.
Peace,
RJ
P.S. Isn’t it time you started enjoying success, power and choice with women, without bullying, buying, begging, BS, booze, or biceps?
Your golden key is right here: the Speed Seduction® Rapid and Total Success With Women System.
Click here to find out more about it now.
Like!
Thank you @Miki!
Good stuff Ross. I’ve heard from the other “Gurus” how you need to make fun of women in order to create some sort of sexual tension. That never really vibed with me. This makes more sense. Thanks.
@Kevin
Nothing that involves degrading another human being vibes with me.
Awesome Ross. Just awesome.
The other day I got a huge compliment from a woman. She said even my voice is so soothing, and my eyes radiate kindness and respect. (I did do the NYIG meditation, tranmusting and extraction from a previous sarge before I met her). All I did was listen attentively, and speak slowly and choosing my words with care. She asked me a LOT of questions. I did do the discovery and to that she sighed and said, “You have a way with words”. 🙂 And I could see the lower lip getting bigger, and a tiny miniature ‘O’ at some point later on after sunrise. But I had just been with another woman the night before and I was a bit exhausted from all the action but my point is just to illustrate you don’t have to do anything rude, or degrade someone. There was a guy in the group who was doing that to her. I was just observing her response and she was really giving it back to him. Then she just left the group and walked away completely. She asked me before leaving if I’d like to join her at the beach. After that I too left that group whose energy was becoming negative, joined her and she said that the guy who was insulting had such an ugly vibe and his eyes were dead. Actually he was an acquaintance of mine and I didn’t agree to everything she said and then she asked me, ‘Has he ever listened to you? I hate the way he treats his wife’. And then she said, “Do u realize how special you are?” I said, ” I don’t know. It’s something that another sees in me and discovers. How can I boast about myself like that?” She said yes but you should know that you are special! She asked me if i’d like to join her for a dance that evening at her friend’s birthday party (and her friend was approaching me all the time and I was actually confused about who I should sarge!!!!) Haha!
@Harsh
Good on you! Great job!
Having more than one Sarge option is the problem I’d prefer to have 🙂
Seems to be a rather complicated problem! First I was tired. Then this girl was talking to me. After a bit her friend (the birthday girl) showed up, joined us, and asked me if I wanted to go para gliding with her. I was too surprised so I didn’t even answer it because I had no idea how I could choose one without offending the other! Then I didn’t even go to the dance because I was too tired and just went to bed early. The next day I left town and couldn’t say bye to the girls as they hadn’t returned home after the party. Later on I sent them a message on FB. They haven’t yet replied but the birthday girl responded to my friend request and added me. But no news yet from the other girl (I could not send her a friend request because of her FB settings) and it’s a bummer because she was responding so well in reality. Sigh!
@Harsh
Here’s what some of my students think. Not sure if you’ll agree, but really, the best thing happening on Facebook, is in April we’re starting our Elite Mastermind “TOP SECRET” Discussion Group that’s part of the soon-to-be-revamped Coaching Program.
April isn’t far away! Looking forward to it Ross!
@Harsh
You’re already in the Coaching program so we’ll make sure you’re in the first division of those we invite into the new discussion forum. We actually will start sending out invitations on April 2. So just hang in a few days 🙂
Can’t tell you how many times a woman is complaining about the guy in her life acting like a jerk thinking that’s cool.
After a little “sweet talk” she’s in my bed with me between her legs. Same old story. Guys have no idea..
@K.C.
AFCs never will (unless they get smart and join us!)
How did you do that?
Touch her on a deep level man. Make her realize she is special (as humans we all are) and someone of tremendous value. ( for her beauty and her personality) Then make her realize the world is limitless and the possibilities for her life are truly endless. open up an entite new world for her.
Once you do that they basically hand you their pussy on a silver platter.
Love seeing the students support each other. April 2, we open our new discussion group!
Hey Ross. No problem not replying to my question. Just be sure to tell us when you launch that elite FB Group. I’ll be joining that. That sexual trauma question is really my biggest hold up right now I feel…..
@Kevin
Should you find yourself wanting to claim the Hayley Quinn Macking Mega-Pack tomorrow, make sure you take me up on the offer you’ll see to save $98 on your first month of coaching membership. That’s how you get in 🙂
Today I set an appointment with a CFO , using terms like “provide leadership for new discoveries” and she said ” I normally don’t do this type of thing , but I will this time because it sound interesting”. Made my day. Or to avoid being accused of harassment at work, “If it wasn’t against company policy, I’d probably tell you that you are classy dresser”
Apply this stuff and letting the ideas marinate in the crock pot of your subconscious will generate many great ideas eventually. I like the FB idea, it would be great if the SS list of old had a rebirth
@Harry
Check out Hayley’s courses. One of them covers specifically how to Sarge at work. I think you’ll be interested.
We’re looking to bring back the days of yore, so to speak, with a 2015 update. Many others have asked when we’re getting the discussion going. Now’s the time.
I use biceps but what a tracts then is my energy
BTW responsible drinking is not “low value” quite the contrary
Nothing wrong with a social drink or two 🙂