Dear Speed Seduction® Student,
Some people are loners who for reasons of their own, can’t or won’t let anyone in their lives. They feel better without anyone around.
Some people choose the “single life” as a proactive choice for how they go through life. There’s a whole movement around this.
And some people feel they can’t be happy if they don’t have someone in their life. Sometimes they enter or put up with real-hate-shun-ships by default rather than be single.
A student of mine reported the following:
> I cant seem to be happy on my own, theres always a part of me thats a little lonely and a little upset all the time. When I have success with a girl the feeling is replaced with joy, but when i screw up and things don’t work out it really gets to me.
RJ here again. Look at how you are languaging it.
If you had a dear friend, who was having trouble with women, would you allow HIM to keep repeating to HIMSELF, “I can’t seem to be happy on my own.”
How many times have you fed your mind that suggestion?
If you mind accepts that suggestion, on a deep level, what do you think will happen to your attempts to be happy on your own?
You need to un-tangle these two things:
“I feel lonely” and “I can’t seem to be happy on my own”
One of them is true, sometimes. The other one is a belief that you are adding power to every time you say it. It’s actually making the problem more acute, not worse.
Look: every human has a need for human company and connection. It’s totally ok to have that need/desire/want DIRECT your behavior.
The problem is when that need/desire/want gets tied in with self-programming commands like, “I can’t seem to be happy on my own”.
So how could you go about separating the raw feelings of loneliness from the story you are attaching to it?
Hmmmm…
Peace and piece,
RJ
P.S. Looking for some INSTANT help blasting past through this? The Speed Seduction® Secret Training Collection contains numerous focused video lessons on Beliefs, Blasting Through Stuck Points, Nailing Your Inner Game – and much more!
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[…] without anyone around. Some people choose the “single life” as a proactive choice for how … Continue reading → [Source: Ross Jeffries Uncensored] Tags: Loneliness, Programming, ross jeffries, self […]
“The greatest personal limitation is to be found not in the things you want to do and can’t, but in the things you’ve never considered doing.”
Richard Bandler
@AM Great truth there, spoken from the Boss himself.
I do think that boys without dads prblboay have a much harder time because their moms teach them the wrong things. I had a dad, but my dad didn’t really tell me anything about women. My mom always told me to be nice, and to be myself.Well, myself was socially awkward, and being nice is incredibly ineffective. And it’s shocking how hard it was for me to change my mindset about this, at first. When my friend told me techniques which I now know to be PUA techniques, I resisted them — being nice was the right way! Who cares if your way works and my way doesn’t; my way should work, therefore I’ll keep doing it!It wasn’t until later that I saw the utter futility of continuing to use the same failed strategies over and over, and when I finally opened up to trying something different, I had tremendously more success.
@Emi,
It takes courage to step out and do what you aren’t used to, but that’s often what it takes. Remember, it’s the very thing that stands far outside what you are used to doing that has the possibility of giving you results far beyond what you are used to having.
RJ
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I start programming the anchoring material into my head — 2012 Atlanta Seminar — Out no where I get slammed to mat three time in three week by three Mormon girls — and no lies told — Shoosh — Can I make this work in California, or do I have to move to Utah — LOL — Anchoring is crazy good magic — I mean, all this sex stuff is complicating my life — but I gotta say, it sure beats trying to decide which hand to use in the middle of the night.
Hey Ross, great info again, i have a question though, i’ve started doing some direct approaches, i can’t seem to get into a conversation or a place to start running some patterns, i have asked if the HB’s sre single & they say no but thanks for asking !, then they move on , get in car, leave the room etc. Any suggestions on how to follow through or what their really saying ?….for me right now i just let go & say ‘next !’ but i would like to know how you would deal with this situation ? K.
Ross,
In my experience, my biggest barrier has been taking that first initial step to approach a woman that I am really attracted to. I, at times feel that the battle is lost even before it is started; because my mind conjures up the things that can go wrong and I begin to think of the steps I could take to deal with them. When I eventually work myself towards that initial approach, I find that time is against me, because she is either aware of my presence or she has moved to a different environment, that makes it difficult for me to engage in conversation.
Regards,
Mark
The quote of that student totally resonated with my old self. The Science of Enlightenment by Shinzen Young and the Skill at Feel practices RJ teaches helped me transform my “normal” state of mind/consciousnesss. I am speaking about vast differences here. I am currently completing that process by making this way of thinking and responding a rooted habit. From my experience maybe all difficulties around meeting women are based on bad programming in the head. And the way to fix it is to do the practices given by Ross and Shinzen. At least the most efficient and certain way to get where you want to be.
@Ivo Thanks. I am not worthy to be mentioned in the same breath as my teacher, however.