Dear Seeker of Success,
There’s one word I REALLY hate.
The “F” word.
No, I don’t mean “flirting,” “f@@%ing,” or “Facebook.”
I teach smart guys like you how to do the first effectively so you can experience more of the second with women you meet in all walks of life as well as online on places like the third (Facebook).
The “F” word I can’t stand is “friends” – as in, when a guy Sarges on a chick and his game gets shot down when she says “Let’s just be friends.”
Man, it hurts my ears!
In fact, learning how to effectively dodge and encounter this “F-bomb” is one of the most timeless challenges faced by my students.
Case in point:
Ross, what can I do to overcome resistance from a girl who says she just wants to be friends?
Things between me and her started out pretty fast, but it’s almost like she’s a bit scared now and is saying she just wants to be my friend. I mentioned that I didn’t want to play or abuse her mind and that I was looking for a truer relationship involving more than either “just sex” or “just hanging out.” I told her that maybe I didn’t want to be just her “friend” that way.
She said, then I would be like just another one of those assholes who never “understood” or “respected” her. So I said, “maybe we should discuss things.” She came over to talk. I tried many patterns on her, including touching and kissing. She said she loves to be with me as I’m fun and I allow her to just “be herself.” But man, it’s tough to get the “follow through” (beyond just being “friends”) when she shows resistance.
I, of course, will move on from her, but I’m looking for some strategies for overcoming when the woman says “I just want to be friends.” Any good suggestions? I’m up for them.
Many times I have taught and said: Never take her first response as written in stone. It’s just a reflection of how and what she is thinking, feeling and believing IN THAT MOMENT and it is always subject to change.
There Are All Sorts Of REAL Meanings To:
“I Just Want To Be Friends.”
The worst case (which doesn’t seem like your situation, if you were touching and kissing her and didn’t get slapped) is that she isn’t attracted, fascinated or aroused by you … and just feels some comfort (you help her “be herself”).
If this is the case, though, you are in trouble.
However, sometimes the “F” word means, “I feel deep feelings; if I have sex with you, my vulnerability will REALLY come out and you might be a person who will use that to crush me.”
In other words, she has both desire (for you, for sex, for intimate contact) AND she also has fear.
Could be she’s had some bad experiences and is looking at you through the lens of those bad experiences.
I encounter the same kind of resistance you are talking about.
Yes, I, Ross Jeffries, Get The “F” Bomb
Dropped On Me. ME!
When this happens I hold my ground and make no apologies.
This might sound like BS, but staying powerfully congruent will get you far.
You are already powerful, and from what I can tell you have a great heart and are willing to learn whatever you can about a woman to help the two of you experience happiness together.
I hereby proclaim that you are LIGHT YEARS AHEAD of the clueless AFCs and Joe Schmucks out there who refuse to claim their power, results, and success with women.
Remember, the power is in you. And as you work your way past the woman’s resistance, say to yourself inside:
MY Skills. MY Results. MY Satisfaction.
My World. MINE.
Peace,
RJ
P.S. Forget about ever again being confused by a woman’s emotional 180s, her fluctuations between wanting you and pushing you away, her last minute buyers remorse, contradictory signals, sudden loss of interest and other up until now deeply frustrating and seemingly irrational actions.
With what I teach you throughout my “Next Generation” System, you’ll remain calmly in control of every interaction and situation with women.
When checking out, make sure to “UPGRADE” to the language pattern collection for word-for-word language that deals with this exact situation.
