Dear Speed Seduction® Students And Fans,
Recently I received an e-mail from a student who is in a sort of purgatory with a woman he met a few weeks ago.
I’ll let him explain it in his own words:
Hey Ross, there is this hottie (I’d say about an HB8) who I’ve met up with a few times. She’s kind of shy, but intelligent and fun once I get her to loosen up. The first meet-up was a nice evening at a coffee shop. The second, we hung out for a while at a quiet little saloon near her apartment. The third time, we went to dinner. Now, not only is this not going in the direction I want it to, but her behavior is perplexing.
The third time, I had planned a “Part II” but she seemed distracted the whole time, and even said “can we go?” as soon as the dinner was over. So I dropped her off and figured it was “Exit, Stage Left” time for this guy. Fair enough. Yet, not 30 minutes later she was texting me about what a wonderful time she had and when can we do it again, and all that. I think I want to see her again, but not if her plan is for us to have dinner once a week, which seems to be where she is trying to take this, which is what I am resisting.
I guess what I’m asking is, how do I determine if she is simply viewing me as her “meal ticket” (literally) or if she might be playing hard to get, just shy, wanting to go to the next step but not finding her own reasons to get there and not knowing how to ask me, etc.?
First of all: I think this confusion could trigger some very supplicating behavior on your part if you don’t watch it. You’ve already bought her dinner and you didn’t mention the part where you banged her so I’ll assume you haven’t yet. You’re already headed down that slippery slope, one nudge away from a free-fall and you better hope you don’t get splinters in your ass if the slope is wooden.
Hey, your emotions are on the line here and your clarity too. You want to move this to the next level and you think she’s trying to corral you into being her standing “dinner date.” If you sense something is up, CALL HER ON IT in a firm, calm, and relaxed way.
The bottom line is: only she can tell you what is going on. You can approximate or guess, but that is all it is.
So, if you can’t get your primary outcome (getting her enthusiastic to fuck you) what steps can you take, what moves can you make to AT LEAST MOVE IN THE DIRECTION OF THE KIND OF MAN YOU WANT TO BE AND THE KIND OF MAN YOU ARE ALREADY EVERDAY BECOMING? WHAT MOVES WILL BEST STRETCH YOU IN THE MOST USEFUL WAYS?
Peace and piece,
RJ
P.S. Need to find your way out of the “pattern” of buying drinks at bars or clubs hoping that will get women to like and sleep with you, or taking women on expensive dinner dates hoping that’ll get them in your bed? Or, worse yet, avoiding falling into this “trap”? All of this, and more, is inside Speed Seduction® 3.0. Click here to get yours now!
I’ve been where this guy is…I normally get the girl in bed on the second or third date, so I’m never in a rush. Also, one of my good friends owns a classy restaurant where I can eat at ‘cost’ (but the girls don’t know that). But one thing was weird with the last girl…we had mad sex on the 2nd date (2 orgasms each) and she was all fired up…or so I thought…the next night she was free I bought her flowers and a bottle of wine, thinking we were going to get it on, and she refused, saying she had to ‘get up early’. I said fine and left, then she emailed me to say we “Weren’t a good match”. Feh. Whatever…next, please.
Ha ha, nothing more to say:)
Look for the subtle messages she is sending out. Try this: Look into her eyes and tell her something really intimate, like how you are looking for a long term committed relationship, and watch her body language closely. If she moves closer, unfolds her arms, parts her lips, or becomes more engaged in the conversation, then she is interested. If she moves away, sits back and crosses her arms, looks away etc. its time to call it a night…and suggest that she pick up the check this time since you were gracious enough to do it last time. Good Luck! Mike